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Big love,
SB x
The competition wound begins the moment we leave ourselves.
Somewhere early, most of us learned that love was rationed. There was one lap, one approving glance, one gold star, and it went to whoever performed best. The body registered this as scarcity. The nervous system began scanning the room, measuring, comparing, bracing. We started living from the outside in.
This is the anatomy of the wound: attention migrates out of the body and into the lives of other people. We track their success the way prey tracks a predator. Their book launch tightens our chest. Their sold-out retreat hollows the belly. We call it ambition, envy, drive, and underneath all of it lives grief, the ache of a self abandoned by its own keeper.
Competition is a symptom of disconnection from essence. When I lose contact with the living transmission moving through me, I have to borrow my worth from a ranking. I reach for a ladder because I have forgotten I am a root.
Essence is unrepeatable. The particular frequency of a soul, moving through a particular body, lineage, wound and medicine, exists once. Nobody else can carry what you are here to carry. Inside that current, there is nothing to win. The question "is she better than me?" dissolves because it has nowhere left to land.
I feel this in my own body. On the days I am disconnected, I scroll and I measure. On the days I am home, another woman's brilliance arrives as a blessing. Her gift lands in my chest as kinship. Her light tells me the field is alive, that transmission is happening everywhere, that the work of the soul is being done through many bodies at once.
The healing is a return of attention to its source. Breath into the belly. A hand on the sternum. A simple question: what is moving through me right now that wants to be expressed? Then follow it, choosing the inner current over the outer scoreboard, again and again.
Competition ends where essence begins. A soul in contact with itself recognises companions everywhere it looks.
With Love,
Sigourney Belle x
I was going to like this post but then I thought no I wouldn't want Sig to have too much congratulations in case it takes from the finite pool of approval and there's none left for me.
Then I saw I could be the first to like this post and then I rushed in.